Day 30 - MoMA


Friday was my first full day in New York City.  I got up and ate breakfast with JuWanda and adjusted to the chaos of two toddlers first thing in the morning.  The kids were great fun and I miss their noise today. 

I took the subway into the city to go to the Museum of Modern Art.  It is always exciting for me to actually see so much of the art work I "know", and I've not bee able to make this stop on previous NYC trips.  It starts to be a bit like a drug for me. seeing all this work that has clearly shaped my own art.  I don't really emulate any particular artist, but I can see the roots of how I can be doing the work that I do because of what came before me.

I attempted to utilize my camera as part of my Left-Handed Series, and found it completely frustrating.  I cannot let go in the way that I am able to with the pastels.   My photography is not abstract...never has been. I couldn't get a single in focus shot all day and abandoned the idea by mid-day on Saturday.

These are the only things I have and I am still debating what my thoughts are about them.  (The rest of the Left-Handed Photography just sucks.) This lovely pregnant woman was wearing a fitted grid dress which was quite interesting with her shape. I tried to let go of the focus/steady issue and see what happened.  Though these may hold some interest, I think the in focus view of her was much better, much more interesting. The top image might be better rotated 90 degrees.

I did take some pictures with my Holga camera that day and will see what has happened once the film is developed.  I also may post some photos from my trip, but they will not be part of the Left-Handed Series. 

Day 27 - Activity Done


This is one of those days that I wanted to do something with my left-handed series, but didn't have any real thought in mind.  Sometimes this works for me, sometimes it doesn't.  I don't think it worked today...at least not for me.  I temper my own criticism since I often have people who respond strongly to pieces I don't really like.


I'm getting ready for a little getaway to New York and look forward to a lot of art museum time in addition to hanging with an old friend.  JuWanda and I have known each other since college.  We played basketball together and have managed to stay in contact through the years. She's the kind of friend that offered to come stay with me after my surgery if I needed help.  No doubt, Alton, her husband didn't hear that since it would mean he was alone with two little ones under the age of 3.  Regardless she is family.  Robert Frost defined home as the place that when you go there they have to take you in.  JuWanda and I are home to one another.

Day 24 - Self Portrait


I was "working" on something off and on today...more of an exercise activity.  I went in to do some more work on it and this came out instead.  Going with the flow.

Sending thoughts to Sumatra that was hit with landslides to add to the devastation from the earthquakes.  In so many ways I want to be there, to help, to do all I can.  I am trying to find a way to make that kind of "work" life possible for me.  I feel like I am using my talents and intelligence to no good end just doing the day to day and collecting my paycheck.  There has to be more purpose for me than this. I'm investigating work with the Red Cross, both American and International as a possibility among other things.

Day 22 and Day 23

There was no Day 21...ashame I didn't mark my three week point with some work, but it just wasn't in me. This one is Day 22. I think it is overworked, but like it more now than when I first finished it. It may be a little of the stress from my icky news earlier in the week trying to find its way out. I also think it may be related to the gray paper. That underlying tone is affecting me in some way.
This is Day 23...today. It is an interesting exercise working with different shaped paper. This is a relatively small square pad I bought today, which was a deliberate attempt to switch things up for me. Things are going very well with my shoulder recovery. I continue to be way ahead of schedule with my range of motion and the daily exercises are going well. Some of the intense fatigue I was experiencing last week seems to have lifted.

Regardless of all that is going on in my egocentric shoulder focused life, the people in the Philippines, Vietnam and Samoa have been slammed by storms this past week. The death toll in Indonesia is rising from the earthquake there. A lot of suffering in the world. So many loved ones lost. So many others having to start from nothing. My problems are small...very small.

Day 20 - Some Days Just Suck

It's been a challenging day in part because I spent the day dealing various crap instead of what I needed to be doing. The remainder was because I was informed that my understanding of how my short-term disability and my personal leave time worked was incorrect. I also learned that the words simultaneously and concurrent actually mean either/or. Had I know that underlying definition used only by our HR manager, I would have been prepared that my leave mandated by my company would be costing me as much as $2,000 in take home salary. Hopefully it will be less...depends on when my doctor releases me to a level my company will accept.

So I had my freak out/break down session this afternoon. I think that is the artist part of my brain that jumps into gear first. My friend John lets me blither on in this state because he knows it just needs to come out. This is always followed by the problem solving engineer side, which is where I am entering now. The second phase was jump started by my friend Xiaoyan who has the ability to say the right thing in a way I can openly receive it. She somehow has the talent of delivering the moment when I can exhale. Amazing!

So today's Left-Handed effort was a response to my sucky day.

Day 19 - Untitled

There was no day 18 art work. I was in a funk after driving to the gym...someone came into my lane...I made a reflexive jerk to honk my horn...with my right arm...major throbbing...sore arm all day...still sore today. Everything's okay, but the inflammation is pretty high.

So here's day 19, which I like, which I wish I had done on better paper. This is a scrap pad that I think I need to throw away...or save for Muyang's visits and her crayola doodles. That sounds better.

My thoughts go out to the Philippines where they are dealing with the aftermath of severe flooding. If you can, please send your donation. Here's a link to get you started: http://www.ondoyrelief.org/

Day 14 & 15

You know that metal piece I was "working" on? Let's just say that for the moment it is an abject failure.

I was experimenting with attaching multiple long rod pieces together by bending them about one another. Doing this one handed proved challenging at best. The attempts to control the piece seemed to take control of watching the form develop. The end result was a mess. I will decide today if I can salvage it.

Maybe I need to remind myself that this Left-Handed Series is an exercise. Right?

Day 13 - Dominant Theme

My shoulder is the dominant theme in my daily life. This series for one keeps things in focus, but much of my day revolves around doing my exercises, TENS treatment with icing, working on my scars, and trying not to do anything stupid.

I think, however, this might be my favorite thus far in the Left-Handed Series. I've been composing another metal piece (something larger than the small table top piece completed on Day 9) the last few days and expect that to get started in the next few days.

Day 12 - The Ugly Truth


So here's a view of three of the four new scars I have. The fourth if far enough behind my back that you can't see it with the others. One of my daily therapies now involves massaging the incision sites in order to minimize scars.

After nine orthopedic surgeries, I'm not overly worried about scarring. Though I did stop wearing skirts to job interviews after one prospective employer looked at my knees and blurted, "What the hell did you do to your knees?"

We'll file this under documentary as well. I was very tired yesterday and this was all I could muster.

Day 11 - True Family

I've given props to my friends that carted me about after my surgery. One person not included in that was my neighbor, Linda. I use "neighbor" but the truth is that Linda is family and she deserves a special prop dedicated to just her.

I spend most holidays with her and her clan...often enough that they ask if I'm coming. Linda gives Moseby treats in the morning...he goes nuts when he sees her. He bounds up and down and bark/cries until she comes outside. Linda is the true Big Sis I never had. I know that Linda will be there whenever I need. She'll take me in a feed me and let me cry on her shoulder. She loves me for who I am and I am beyond blessed to have her next door.

Linda filled in the gaps after my surgery and was just there for me in a dozen little ways. Thank you Linda for being a great friend and my Big Sis. Love you!

Day 9 - A Little Metal Work




I realized the other day that I probably could do some small rod bending with my left hand. Not too bad. I won't be doing any welding work for quite some time but this may provide an outlet for some metal sculpting in the interim.

Remember that this is an exercise while I am restricted to using my left hand only for the majority of daily activities. It remains to be seen if there is any Art value beyond the exercise.

Day 8 - A Little Physical Therapy

Three times a week I go for physical therapy where Mateo very gently moves my arm in order to regain my range of motion. I'm not allowed to move my arm myself...passive movement only. Mateo is a sweet gentle spirit and a very good match up for me.

Good thing I'm a Lesbian or I would be seriously crushing on his gorgeous self.

...anyway the process is not much fun, but we hit goal milestone for today when he was able to lift my arm to 90 degrees from my side.

He knows to check in with me about the pain because I will take whatever. I don't emote pain. I don't grimace or moan. All he gets from me is, "Yep, I feel that or it's sharp right there." In a weird way I look forward to these sessions. Each one brings progress and Mateo is the only real witness to the steps along the way.

Day 7-Dragging

Today I just feel tired...which may be an improvement. There is very little pain now so I can attune to the fact that my body is dragging. Some of that is the healing process and the other is the fact that I don't have the most restful sleep just yet. Regardless, I'm pleased with how things are progressing.

Day 6 - Wounded Me

I had to take the bandage off today 'cause the tape was driving me batty. More scars to add to my array. I'm considering having the number of the surgery tattooed next to each related scar.

I'm relieved that my "Running Bear" Tattoo came through unscathed.

We'll have to file this under 'documentary' for the Left-Handed Series. It was what was in my head & felt I should roll with it.

Left-Handed Series Day 5

Props to my friends who showed up without my asking. They took me to the hospital, brought me home, kept my ice machine running, brought me food, carted me about and called every step of the way.

You don't have to call true friends.
True friends just show up when you need them.

I feel the love.
Thanks MJ, Marty, Julia, Shawn and Xiaoyan!

Left-Handed Series Day 4


Had a rough night. My shoulder is very reactive to the weather changes and a full night of thunderstorms left me a throbbing mess. I'm not on any heavy pain killers because they knock me on my ass but don't cut much of the pain. Not a fair trade.

...I recognize that the artwork has been pretty ego-centric with self-portrait variations. I can only say that my every consciousness is revolving around trying to recover from my surgery & re-adapt my life for the time being.

I have a four month time table to where I will be released for 'full' functioning. The first week is one of the most challenging phases of the recovery. Overall I'm doing well and am happy with how this series is progressing.

Left-Handed Series Day 3


I don't know if I will post everyday, but do intend to move forward in my effort to see what will happen creatively working with my left hand. I am looking forward to a little play with my new Holga camera. Still working on freeing my right handed self to allow my left hand to do as it pleases. I have at least six weeks trapped in the sling...letting the possibility unfold.